悲？

这一刻，在那脑海深处里，有着那一股好热切，一直徘徊不去的想法。如果可以，真的好想把时间就此打住，永远地停留，再也不要那么不留情地转动，再也没有时光飞逝的感叹。

是逃避吗？或许是吧！逃避就摆在眼前，怎么都改变不了的事实·。但不想面对的心情却日益赠多，并不是小孩子闹别扭，而是真真切切的不想去面对这即将离开的事实。还是不舍呢？是啊。两个月，是一段好长的时间。在家中的这段时间，已经习惯了它的味道，它的氛围，它的气息。而就在习惯了之后，再一次离别是残忍的。不舍的是人，事和物仅仅居其次。人啊，是充满感情的。离别又岂是挥手道别这般简易呢？它蕴含着永无止境的思念，而思念又是如此的煎熬。

每一次的离别都是伤心的。往往那过于发达的泪腺就不经控制，肆惮地解放泪水，而泪水就在眼眶里泛滥，最后终于得以释放，无情地洒在脸上。尽情地哭，哭得歇斯底里，哭得再无眼泪为止。痛哭过后，心情也稍许转佳。毕竟，哭，亦是一种宣泄的好法门。

而今次，却不仅仅是为着离别伤痛，而是在异地的那人，事，与物。无法否认，其中的确带着点逃避的心态去面对那特定的人。其中的辛酸并非三言两语就可道尽，也并非泛泛人们可了解。唯有袮可带给我安慰。在袮里面，我寻见呵护，解脱。是啊，主，唯有你是这一切的主宰。引领我接下来的日子，我把自己完全的交托，并凭信心宣告，主，袮是救世的主，袮是掌管一切的君王，在袮所有的事都能成！在地上的纷争，尔虞我诈，不公，在袮必能寻着安慰，在袮有满满的恩惠。袮的恩典是够我们用！袮的爱也必大大地临在我们身上！

日子还是持续着。又能如何呢？为着即将来到的新一年，欢欣鼓舞吧。在新一年，抛开所有的不快，珍惜拥有的当下，迈向阳光的前程直跑吧。脱下旧的自己，穿上新的形态，展现全新的自己。朋友们，努力向前吧！并没有什么是放不下，放不开的。何苦让尘封的记忆在原地来回踏步呢？谈何容易呀！真的放开来做了，却发现做何其难喔。加油吧！

最近的我，发现自己爱上了华文。是好事吗？

永远，到底有多远呢？

夜

夜-如斯凄美 夜-如斯寂静
美得扣人心弦 美得揪人魂魄
静得没有一丝一毫的微波荡漾
静得能清晰听见规律跳动的心跳声
静得似乎可以细听毛孔轻轻的呼吸声

思绪就无拦阻地飘逸
直至堕落在那特定的回忆里
眼泪却不能只在眼眶打滚
毫不留情地 肆无忌惮地滑落
干了的脸颊再一次划出了两道泪痕

好可笑 好感慨 好感叹
总以为自己好勇敢 好成熟
以为自己已长大
可以独当一面
其实不然啊
在那伪装坚强的面具底下
却是脆弱 害怕

哭吧 哭并不是罪

hard worker?

SCORPIO- The Addict

EXTREMELY adorable. Loves to joke. Very good sense of humor. Will try almost anything once. Loves to be pampered. Energetic. Predictable. GREAT kisser. Always get what they want. Attractive. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. Loves to party but at times to the extreme. Loves the smell and feel of money and is good at making it but just as good at spending it! Very protective over loved ones. HARD workers. Can be a good friend but if is disrespected by a friend, the friendship will end. Romantic. Caring.

That's what exactly from an e-mail sent by a friend. It's scarily, kind of TRUE.

However, I doubt a statement, the particular statement- HARD workers. HARD worker? Hahahaha. I really doubt it. Perhaps, a motivation and a kind reminder for me, to be one? =)

Christmas

Unsoundly, Christmas of 2009 passed. Time flies. It really does. It's not anything but great. And I mean GREAT! I was in Sibu for the festive. Sibu has always had the thickest atmosphere for the festive season, I guess, if compared with the other places. The reason for it, Sibu is said to be a Christianity town. Yea. Sibu possesses lots and lots of churches. Sibu is a blessed town!

I love Christmas. I really do. It's the time of giving, sharing, forgiving, rejoicing, celebrating. It's the time of loving. Love is great. Love brings people together. Love brings miracles. Love brings joy. Love brings warmth. This is what I had, particularly, learnt from a sermon a pastor gave. Love melts people, even the hardest soul will be moved by one's constant and unending love. How much God had loved us that He gave us His own son, Jesus Christ, as the nation's savior. How much He loved us that He is willing to sacrifice His son so as to save us. So, how could we don't even try to love, try to give out even a little bit of love to the world, to the people around us? We love, because God loves us first!

Reminiscences on 24th and 25th. The Christmas eve and the Christmas day. I am saying, again. It was great! LOL! I was at the town square on the eve. There was a Christmas celebration being held. I was going with family. I would really like to appreciate the time with them. I met with lots of friends too. These are the people who made the festive great. Hah. We were having Count down for Christmas that night. The atmosphere was great with so many people counting down together. And then, fire crackers were played as a mean of celebrating the arrival of Christmas. That was nice, where the dark sky was brightened by the lighting of fire crackers; and the colors made the sky look nice.

It was 25th then. I went for the church service that morning. And, it was my brother's birthday. It was just a coincidence, where his lunar birthday fell on the Christmas day in this particular year. So, we had celebration, of his birthday, and of the Christmas. 2 in 1? Haha. And, that's all.

I am kind of lazy to upload photos. You may look up the photos at my Facebook profile, if, only if, you are interested. It may seem a bit late, but still, wish all a merry Christmas and a prosperous year ahead!!

pain

Pain. Pain. Pain. Pain. Pain.

Intense, extreme, drastic, strong, severe, extravagant, excessive, exaggerated, tremendous, supreme, immense, great pain is killing me.

Literally, I was on the verge of dying due to the pain.

I hate, hate, hate, hate, hate the stuff.

Pain, please leave me alone.

Winter Solstice

It was winter solstice festival yesterday. 22nd December 2009. It was a meaningful day for me. I was a legal driver on the particular day. *Laugh Out Loud!!!!!!!!!* Hahahahahahahahaha!! Congrats me!

Yea, I passed my JPJ test yesterday! I can finally bid goodbye to the driving school after about a month of car practising. Cool. Still, I would like to thank God for leading me all the way through. Thanks for His guidance that I can pass the test before I go back to study again.

Last night also, we celebrated the festival by having dinner outside. We had steampot. And of course, we made 汤圆, which is the sole representation of this particular festival.

Christmas is just around the corner. Cherish. =)

Bintulu

Today, I must write something. And I mean it. I had been lazy to update. I used to open a window for writing a new post, but then it was, every single time, ended up with pressing the [X] button on the top right of the window.

It's 23rd December. The past few days had been kind of busy. Let's reminisce.

I would talk on the Bintulu trip during 18th December til 20th December. It was 第二十三届砂沙汶彭城刘氏公会嘉年华会, the annual carnival of Lau's Association which was appointed to be hold in Bintulu in this particular year. I, was a representative for Sibu's Lau's, the one for the calligraphy competition.

18th December 2009. The first day.

We, my mum, my brother, and I; they went for the sake of accompanying me, haha. Well, we woke up at 6am. And, around 6:30am, my cousin fetched us to the Sibu's Lau's Association, which the building is situated somewhere at Sungai Merah. That's the site for gathering all of the participants. We took a photo before departing, by bus, to the destination, Bintulu.

~the representatives from Sibu~

Then, we departed. A tiring few hours sitting on the bus. I was sleeping most of the time though. We reached at around 12 noon. We reached straight at the hotel. It was New World Suites, quite a nice hotel.

So, we checked in, settled ourselves, and went for lunch. And, we went for shopping at Park City Mall. I was free for the first two days as my competition was held on Sunday, 20th.

the schedule for each competition.

The Bintulu Lau's Association
which is just the opposite of the hotel.

Evening. We got back to hotel and bathed, and prepared ourselves for the welcoming ceremony that night. It was held in the Civic Centre of Bintulu. We lined up according to the area we came from. There were all the Lau's people who came from different place, from Sarawak-Kuching, Sibu, Miri, Bintulu, Limbang, Sarikei, Bintangor, Sabah, and Brunei, and so that made up the 砂沙汶. Then, we went in the hall accordingly when the ceremony started. Bintulu, as the host, organized the welcoming dinner, the mean of welcoming people from different places.

queuing

欢迎宴. @the opening ceremony.

And that, the first day ended.

19th December 2009. The second day.

It was a totally free day. We can have our own activities, as I was not involved in any competition held on the day. My mum went to find her friends, and keep chatting away. I and my brother were like stayed at a side and went on our own world. Lol. Her friends brought us here and there, and ate here and there. After that, we went to find my cousin. We went on shopping again and had dinner with cousin. And, unsoundly, the second day ended when we went into our slumber land.

20th December 2009. The third day.

It was my competition day.

Calligraphy competition.

It was damn cold where the competition was hold. I was freezing until my hands were trembling. And that, I asked my mum to help me to take a jacket for me. Haha. Thanks for that. =)

Well, I got a consolation prize for the competition.

The night, we were having the farewell dinner. The three days came to its end now. Bintulu appeared to be the overall champion for the carnival. Hmm. Many doubted it, and many were unsatisfied with the result, especially us from Sibu. Sibu used to be the champion over the years. Well, no offense for it, but Bintulu won overall the subjective judging competition, for like singing competition, drawing competition. While, the objective judging competition, as badminton competition, basketball competition, they didn't manage to win. So, that's the reason for the doubting.

欢送宴 @the closing ceremony.

After the dinner ended, we came back to Sibu, again, by bus. We reached at around 1am on the 21st December. And, I went on my sweet dream.

And, it all ended.

(:

(: I found that I had so little posts in December. Reason: laziness plus procrastination, which I am really good of!

(: I love reminiscing these days. Browsing at the old photos, listening to the old songs, reading up the old blog, recalling back the memories.

(: I enjoy reading people's blog. Just simply love. And I actually read a friend's blog yesterday where the passages are well-written. They, made me cry.

(: Yet I love crying, which I mean shedding tears out of the reason of touching, missing, ain't the reason of grievousness for sure! The tears of the formal, is sweet; but bitter for the latter.

(: It's Olivia's birthday today. Happy Birthday!! Enjoy your 18th birthday. Last night, or this morning, or accurately, the midnight, when I sent my wish to you, the feeling of missing you raised in my heart, deeply. Miss you and love you always! All the best to you in your life.

(: I am currently reading a great religious philosophy book- Simple and Outstanding. It's a nice book, with lots of great teachings.

(: I had dinner in my relative's house just now. It was good.

(: I was busied with banks. Guess what? I am 18 finally, and so I went to change my ATM cards to the 18 type, which means no more the guidance of parents, and the utmost, no more limitation for the withdrawal. And, I own a Debit Card now! *LOL*

(: I can't stop watching Autumn's Concerto!! It's a Taiwanese drama. It's so darn nice man!! It's mostly, touching, which makes me cry damn hard.

(: 2009 is going to end soon. Time flies. 2009 is a good and packed year, and with lots of so-called first time! It's soon be a past. Sigh.

(: Until now, I still haven't go and update my IC (Identity Card), or it's called Mykad in this country. I should have gone and done with this particular thingy.

(: I am always envious of those who are well in Chinese. I really do! I just don't have the muse and to produce those beautiful and flowery passages. Really, super duper envious of 'em.

(: The car-learning is still going on. I hope I can have my test and pass it within this month.

(: Holidays is going to end soon, in a very near soon. Sob. Sob. SOB. It denotes the leaving of home, and the heading to Shah Alam, again. Owh. What can be done right/? After all, this is a student's life.

(: Am going to Bintulu on Friday, until Sunday, for the calligraphy competition. And yea, I had finally, eventually, bought the ink for the calligraphy on the day before yesterday. All the best!

(: Christmas is coming very soon. Nice. But I can't join the Christmas procession which will be held on this Saturday. I am in Bintulu.

(: Have no idea of buying which mobile phone. Should be Nokia by the way, but have really not had any idea on the series and model. Some ideas?

(: I love to set my status to Appear Offline these days, without any particular reason. It's the intuition I guess.

(: I changed my subscription of Broadband to the package of RM50/month. But there's something in between. Hope it can be settled in its best way.

(: The PC Fair in Sibu had just passed. Sadly to say, the fair sucks. Hmm.

(: This has been a boring post I guess. If you have been reading all the way through, I would like to thank for your bearing. *Wink*

Now I am listening to 不为明天忧虑. I just love this song. And I am listening to it over and over again. The song is great. My heart is always being moved when listening to it. Just to share its lyric.

回首童年时光
不知道什么叫忧愁
随着年岁增多，烦恼也跟着多
许多人忙忙碌碌的追求
却没有平安喜乐
再多努力也改变不了什么
你看天上飞鸟
快乐自在的翱翔
你看野地的花
如此美丽芬芳
慈爱的天父会养活他们
他们就不必烦忧

我们也当像他们一样
把重担都卸给主
我不为明天忧虑
天父知道我虽不好
但他却能垂顾我
他医治我的创伤
他同情我的软弱
我知道我主掌管明天
我也不为明天忧虑

pass

Have not been updating for days again. My body is just filled with a plenitude of laziness. So does my mind which is laid with procrastinating element. And so, they end up with the effect mentioned. *grins*

Well, yesterday, I was having my Pre-test for my driving. Gosh, I was so nervous; there are thousands of butterflies in my stomach! It was a real nervous, I guess I had not been so nervous before, even when I was having gun shot activity during National Service training. Anyway, I have passed it. Thanks God! You are highly deserved of the praise! And also, thanks for all of my friends' encouragements and blessings. They bushed me up. Thanks guys.

Yet, I was fretting about my JPJ test now. The JPJ test will only be conducted on Tuesdays. And yet, the Tuesdays left for December are accordingly 15th, 22nd, and 29th; which means there are 3 Tuesdays left only. And guess what, JPJ gave out a notification few days ago, an abrupt notification, that there won't have test on 15th. Authority! Authority is just more than anything. Sigh. So, there will only be 22nd and 29th. But then, the initial 15th testers are summoned to 22nd. So, I don't have the chance on 22nd. What about 29th? it's the end of the month, and there isn't any confirmation of test. Liking or not, they can say no if they want. Gosh! And, if there is a test on the day, the matter is once again, amount of testers. I really hope I can be arranged to test on that day, and that I can pass it! Lord, please guide me all the way through.

And, there is a real beast this few days. I was liked, kind of irritating over it! The character of the matter is of the platitude- a platitudinous being. It's something which can be considered as some kind of plagiarism for me. Well, the being plagiarized something from me, and won, more or less, some kind of plaudits from others. Guts. I don't want to reveal the thing here though. But just to express my feelings. I, really, grow more disliking on the being. The level of disliking, is on the verge of its zenith. Haiz. I remembered Angelina always commented on the plebeian tastes and deeds of the being. Yea, that's zany weirdo.

Don't get on my nerves again! Sincerely plead to you.

updates

Some updates.

1. I went for a reunion night last Saturday. Well, the reunion was of my mum; the old friends' reunion night. I didn't know clearly why, but, we, my siblings and I, tantamount-ly, the children of my mum, *LOL* actually went for the event. Okay, my point is on the relationships, the friendships. They were mostly primary and secondary schoolmates. Yet, they still keep contact, and their relationships, truly, make me feel envious of. It's quite often that they have the reunion, every now and then. Hah! This is the point. Hopefully, my relationships with my friends, as well, will last for decades. And, when we turn into thirties, forties, we may have such kind of reunion. After all, I appreciate friends. They are the great and precious treasure in my life!

2. I went for church service last night, for I had car learning in the morning. It was a communion service. The sermon given was great. It was about Christmas, the preach was on Jesus who came to earth as human; mostly about His humility to put off His dignity and came to earth as a human. The point which caught my mind intensively was: say, car is created by human, but human would never change themselves into car. This just sounds right and logical. BUT, God who created human, actually changed Himself into His creation, that's human. Indeed, we really need to reflect ourselves. Think of it, what we do is nothing if compared to God. Hmm. Ponder for yourselves.

3. Regarding my car-learning. It's about the fourth week and I am having my Pre-test very soon. So far, not so good. Ha ha. Well, it was really terrible at first place. But now, gradually, improvements do take place, and it's alright for everything now, except one which is a grand one- timidness. Timidness..? Aww. I am kind of scared! The part which I scared most is the climbing. Huh. Lead me, Lord! I know, it may seem impossible, but in God, it's possible to its fullest! God has His way, and He has prepared everything well, I should receive and take from Him with faith. I proclaim in Jesus' name that everything will be fine, and everything can be done in Him! Amen!

4. I had overused my Broadband. Owh, Guess what? I received a message regarding this just now. The message sounds [Dear Sir/Ms, you have exceeded the 5GB/ mth usage as per Celcom Broadband policy. We reserve the right to control yr broadband speed when deemed necessary. Thk U.] Hah! What on earth is this? It's just the starting of the month man!! Gosh. Oh well, I did download quite a lot of things these few days, mostly some programs which really cost much memory. So, it's my fault. Sob. Hopefully the line won't turn really slow.

5. Current obsession: PS2. Hah! The obsession of the family as well. It's kind of boring at home, and so, we played the games everyday. But then, it's obsession of glimpse. I will soon get bored of it. After all, it's kid's thingy. It seems the kids won't get dull of it so easily. My younger brother, just a perfect instance. He just doesn't get bored of playing. Lol. By the way, I love Wii more. Hah! I wish to own one, but, it's kinda expensive. Owh, it costs about 1000 bucks. Haih. Who can sponsor one for me? Hahaha.

6. I am about to go for the calligraphy competition soon, the next Friday, 18th December at Bintulu. But guess what? I don't even start practicing on it. I don't have the ink at house either. The one at my house had just been used up during the last competition. And, I remembered during the competition, I ran out of ink and I had actually got it from others. Lolz. Sort of simply? However, this time around, it's the annual carnival of Lau's association which turns to be hold at Bintulu this year; and I'm one of the representative of Sibu for the calligraphy competition. So, should take it, at least, a bit more serious. Haha. Should buy up the ink and a better brush, and start practicing on it. Hopefully, could excel in the competition. Hah! *Add on: I am going to miss the Christmas caroling parade on 19th December. I will be in Bintulu from 18th til 20th. =(

Up to here first. Catch up later. Chau~

expressive

Just want to share two songs here.

* 老婆-S.H.E

* 真的我没事-符致逸

They mean on the lyric.

Good, meaningful, expressive;
just so nice to substitute the usage of words;
to express the feeling.

Let the lyric speaks.

老婆-S.H.E

从昨天到今天
还有明天
感谢老天
让你们陪在我身边
爱的心痛的心
等待的心
因为你们的拥抱
我很放心
当初见面的不安
彼此的探索
也许有些茫然迷惑
朝夕相处才发现
这世界中
没有人比你们更懂我
朋友姐妹
都已不够来形容
我们的默契骄傲
扶持与包容
老婆老婆
我们一起打勾勾
请记得约定的旅程到永久

真的我没事-符致逸

On and on, the pain goes on
And it wouldn't just wouldn't die
我竟远比想像中软弱旦无能为力
对你的眼神选择了逃避恨自己恨自己

On and on, the pain lives on
It's hurting so much more
就像我被悔不当初的罪恶吞去
惩罚过后能否带来解脱

I'll be fine I'll be fine
So many cried, listening to God
让坚强不只是种伪装
So many lies, listening to you
天亮后
I will be fine

On and on, the pain goes on and
I just don't know how to cope
伸手抱住自己是否就能够不再空虚
最后信念别放弃

I will be fine I will be fine
So many cried, listening to you
希望你能再给我力量
I will be fine So many lies, listening to you
什么时候
I will be fine

当我再也不对任何事期待
只剩下你只剩下你
有天当我舍弃一切见你
请你要微笑不语

So many cried, listening to you
希望你能再给我力量
I will be fine
So many lies, listening to you
什么时候
I will be fine

good deed

A Christmas card.

3-dimensional

I bought it this morning, when having my brunch in a cafe.
There is a person who brought the cards to sell for charities. Ha ha.
It costs 10 bucks. Well, that's for charity purpose. So, I had done a good deed.

LOL.

FUSS

I HATE HER

I HATE HER

I HATE HER

I HATE HER
I HATE HER

I'm so pissed off with the learning of car-driving. Well, it's not the fuss over the learning itself, but the teacher. A real irritation over her. HER. I remembered someone told me before that, a female teacher is usually more hot-tempered than a male. And now it's proven to be true. My sincere advice is that, don't find yourself a female to teach you on driving, and ESPECIALLY the one of mine. I wouldn't be so mean to spell out her name here of course; in the fact that I am not really well-known about her name! Hah! You can seek for me for it if you want though. I would be more than happy to tell you, so as to, mightily, avoid the occurrence of the another round of TRAGIC!! I will wish, hopefully, that I can actually spread the fuss to the world; that no more people will search for her in their car-driving matter, and that she will finally lose her job!!!!! I know I have been mean at this point, but, but, but, I was just too angry to bear for any longer.

I don't want to further describe the tragic. It's going to use up loads of words and spaces. Also, I wouldn't wish to contaminate my wall by those useless deeds, or/and, to waste my space for highly describing her and her everything, although there isn't limitation of memory? Another point is that, I don't want to, say, record the passive accounts; as the recording of words, for me, is the mean of remembrance of things which happen in my life. I would rather take down those happy, positive things to be the remembrance which can warm heart, ease tense, soothe feeling after all. What for of taping the tragedies which will just bring the sorrow and pain again and again?

And, also, I know I should forgive. Forgive is virtue? Hah! Anyhow, forgive is the way to let myself feeling better, at least a bit. But, forgiveness is difficult, at times. Or most of the times? I guess so. Sometimes, not every "sorry" will be responded by "you're welcome". Really. When one's heart had been hurt so badly, the "you're welcome", "it's okay", "never mind" would not be spoken so easily any longer. Forgiveness ain't easy when one is being scolded for no reason; or on the other words, when one is being scolded and blamed with his perfect deeds. I mean, when one is doing all the things right, without any single flaw, but he has been frequently scolded. How can you easily forgive the scolder? No, it ain't easy! Sometimes, it's unwilling! How can one be willing to forgive after all of the innocent blames? Last, would you forgive when you have been hurt, with the fact that you actually pay for it? This is just exactly what I experience now. Yea, I pay for her scolding. I pay to get unhappiness in myself. I pay to let myself in the state of indignation! What the fact is this??!!

You are in my mind!

Although you are not by my side
you are in my mind

I saw this verse at a friend's Facebook. I find it a meaningful phrase, sort of expressive one which can reveal one's feeling just nicely. A simple sentence, but with its deep meaning; it just shines in the center of spotlight, it just appears to be so a beautiful sentence!

This is especially dedicated to all of those far-away friends. Ha ha. Indeed, you are not by my side, but, you are in my mind! Well, I would, once again, mention this old little thingy. Compatibility. Some friends, even though they are by my side, cruelly to say, they are not in my mind. Why? I had tried also, but the result was still the same. If they have been not true friends of us, who have actually not being, at least a bit contributive to the friendship which is just so a simple one; while, in contrary, they have been some sort of commercialize the bond of friends, with the aim of getting some benefits on behalf of their owns. How would you keep them in your mind?

However, I am grateful enough for I have actually not have too many of such kind of friends. My friends are, mostly, true friends of mine. I appreciate them. I love them. Indeed, most of us had been apart from each others after Form 5, for capturing own dreams. Most of us left this land as well. And now, we are actually all over the country, some have been out of this country too. We have no longer had the time of seeing each other everyday. This has been replaced by the usage of digital stuff, the usage of technology. Thanks to the technology, we can still have the means to keep contact with one another. But, still, that is not real enough; that's just virtue which still can't substitute the real feelings, and which still can't cease the feeling of missing each other.

Well, besides those secondary school's friends. The verse is also dedicated to my friends in National Service. The three months of serving the country is a worth of those valuable friends. Truly, we shared the three months time together; ate together, drank together, slept together, bathed together, laughed together, cried together, marched together, exercised together, crazy-ed together. That was memorable, unforgettable! I really miss all of you. We started from not knowing one another, and when the time of first leaving home where most of us missed family badly, until we got to know each other, and built up our strong bonds of friendships, and on the last day, we were so sad, crying for the leaving of each other, when we didn't want to let go of one another, when we claimed we still wanted to stay in the camp. Ouh. Those moments were so precious.

I would like to say, the verse mentioned above is not purposely for friends. I have thought on it over family as well. I am now having holidays at home, so, my family members are by my side. But, I am referring, say, when I was not at home. Yea, when I was still not at home the last few months, I used to homesick a lot. Those time shall fit in the verse. Besides, a friend had actually linked it to religion. She said, although God is not by our side, His Holy Spirit is always with us, and is always in our mind and heart. True. Indeed, lots of situations can fit in the verse. It's up to you on how to ponder it.

Miri

Had been going to Miri for the past two days. 21st and 22nd November, tantamount-ly, the past Saturday and Sunday. Well, I went for a relative's wedding dinner which was hold on Saturday's evening. We went by car. And yea, the journey is tiring, I mean the approximately-5-hours on car. I could be sleeping actually, but then the condition of the roads is really GOOD, literally the opposition of it, that I could really hardly fall into sleep. The condition is too bad, seriously.

I would like to talk a bit on the wedding dinner here, particularly; for the dinner was kind of different from the other ordinary wedding dinners. It was almost the same as others, the ordinary feasting stuff, but, there was some points which had really made it so different and so meaningful. Same same but different! Hah! The dinner had conveyed two imperative elements, the matter of relationships between family, and of the one between friends. It was a dinner of warmth. Indeed, the scene was kind of touching that quite a lot of people actually wept over it.

First, about the family, precisely, it was towards parents. The bride and groom had actually planned a session of like thanksgiving to both of their parents without their parents' knowing. The parents had been asked to close their eyes by the MC, and at this time, the bride and groom took out the flowers and gifts, and presented to the parents. And, they hugged them. The situation was just so warmth. After that, they started to give piece of speech to their parents. At this moment, people were moved, and tears were induced. I saw people weeping. And, me, of course was the one of them too. It touched, especially with the background song, 感恩的心. Seriously, just like what the bride said, it was parents' attribution that she could grow so well until today. Without parents, we are seriously nothing. Should really appreciate them! The meaningful song, its meaningful lyric. Take a read and understand its meaning, it really means a lot. Appreciate.

我来自偶然 像一颗尘土

有谁看出我的脆弱
我来自何方 我情归何处
谁在下一刻呼唤我

天地虽宽 这条路却难走
我看遍这人间坎坷辛苦
我还有多少爱 我还有多少泪
要苍天知道 我不认输

感恩的心 感谢有你
伴我一生 让我有勇气作我自己
感恩的心 感谢命运
花开花落 我一样会珍惜

Next, the other point is of friendship, friends. The friends of the bride and groom were presenting a song to this couples. The song, was kind of old, ordinary, but it was so meaningful. Not more than others, it was 朋友. It once again made me cry. Friends mean a lot to me. Indeed, they are the precious gifts, the valuable gifts, the priceless gifts. Nowadays, particularly, I really appreciate these beings around me. The days of studying where parents are not around, friends play the role. Also, the distant friends, I learn to appreciate you more, at the same time, miss you more. Yea, should have really appreciate the time when all of us can gather and have fun together. The lyric of the song, simple, but loads with its deep meaning.

这些年一个人
风也过雨也走
有过泪有过错
还记得坚持甚麽

真爱过才会懂
会寂寞会回首
终有梦终有你在心中

朋友一生一起走
那些日子不再有
一句话一辈子
一生情一杯酒
朋友不曾孤单过
一声朋友你会懂
还有伤还有痛
还要走还有我

Well, this short trip to Miri was fun. Had been met up with lots of relatives, who I had not been seeing for long. Life is just so hectic. Everyone has loads of own things to get up with. And so, the two days were just a simple met up, a simple gather. But then, it was still quite fun. I had actually gotten lots of thinking throughout the trip. It was on the way, by the roadside, we had seen lots of cows. Ha ha. And we were liked feeling so weird over the cows; or may be we felt surprised to see the cows, as we could really, so and so barely to see any cow. I had thought of is this the impact of development to us? This generation, really, lived up with all the high concrete buildings, with all the highly advanced technologies; we had rarely had chance to expose to nature. And that, we can, still, actually to recognize the cow. I guess, the generation in advance, will eventually appear to not know and recognize the cow even if it stands in front of them. Should that be good or bad? With the highly developed cultures and societies, but with the zero knowledge on any single thing which is related with nature? We should contemplate on it.

Aha, it seems a bit heavy talk. Anyway, along the trip, especially over the places like hotels, malls... the atmosphere of Christmas is thick. The Christmas decoration is all over the place already. Yea, Christmas is around the corner. But then, all of these decoration seem to be the way to attract customers, it seems to be the business tactic. In this place of view, it really seems Christmas has lost its original meaning and purpose. Behind all of these gorgeous decorations and celebrations, are we still remembered the original and the initial purpose and meaning of Christmas? This is a point to contemplate on too.

Ouh, it seems to bias onto heavy thingy again. Hmm. Well, should talk a bit on these two days in Miri. We had been staying in Imperial Hotel. That night, all of us slept late. The kids, I was still considered a kid, LOL. We played together, the Poker cards, the card games; while the adults were having their endless talks, they had so much things to talk on. Hah.

The next morning, we woke up early, by the way. First, we had breakfast. Then, had been shopping in Bintang Mall. It was quite a grand mall. Then, we had visited up some other relatives at their houses. Just stayed for a short while for each site as we were running out of time. After that, finally, around 4pm, we started our journey back to Sibu. No choice, it's Monday again, and everyone has to start the daily hectic paces again, and that's why we couldn't manage to stay any longer. Again, bear with the long car journey and the excellence road's condition all the way long. However, anyway, in short, it was a good trip!

It has been quite a long post. Hah. Thanks for bearing with me. Ha ha. Going to sleep. Catch up later.

visit. feast.

It had been a nice outing today. We went to visit our beloved principal in her house. She had been unwell for a while about the spinal problem. Shall really keep this in prayer!! We had a good time, talking and sharing about life. We talked about the past, the current, the future. Talking into the past, yea, it made me feel that I had actually missed my secondary life a lot, I miss friends, I miss teachers, I miss school. We used to be the most different and special group in school before. Over-gregarious, over-sociable, over-active. The teachers had often remarked on missing our batch; what more about us? We miss all of you as well, indeed. Also, these beings, are those who make who we are today. They really deserve a thank you. Ouh. We had been talking about a formula which the principal used to teach us. It's a formula of success.

Success=Effort+Ability+Prayer+Attitude

This is just so true! Also, our attitudes decide our altitudes! This is also what she used to tell us. True, very true. Anything we do actually reflects our attitudes. People should really display good attitudes. Seriously, attitude is a crucial element to decide one's success.

Well, after the visitation, we went to have some food. It was a nice time. And, just the same all thing, Sharon and I had been so crazy again. We took quite a number of photos. This one, especially, was the one which can portray our craziness. But, it's kind of sad that the pose which should be nice was a bit of deformed. Haha.

Besides, Angelina and I had had the thing went on again. Yea, the thing among us. Ouh, I just get a bit frustrated when talking about this. Yet, it should just be the secret among us. Ai Zhen, feel like calling your Chinese name, haha; don't be calculative over it. I know it's frustrating, but what to do? I had been thinking a lot on the verse-your attitude decides your altitude. Why should we have been so narrow-minded right? But then, sigh, said is easier than done. I will try. So do you. Also, thanks for sharing this stuff with me, really.

Well, when we had finished eating, and before left, we had a photo taken, just for a memory. And may be the evidence of being here together? Ha ha.

love ya Ms Sia~

*p/s: I really have no idea on what the title should be. Sigh. I have always faced the problem of titling a passage. Gosh. This time around, I named it Visit. Feast. Ok, I should explain for it. It's just simply because we went to a visitation to the principal. So, that goes the word Visit. Then, after that, we went to eat. So, the Feast. That shall be done for the title. LOL.

Best of luck

Had not been updating for two days. The reason, I'm kind of busy these days, with loads of dramas!! Haha. Drama is always addictive, seriously. I just couldn't get myself off once started to watch, but kept more slacken, with the ceaseless desires of even much more to continue watching, episode by episode, as they are getting more exciting down the episodes. It just gets you curious, and so, will definitely keep track on it so as to know what will happen next.

Currently I am watching a drama which has been talked about much these days. A Hong Kong drama, Beyond The Realm Of Conscience, 宫心计. It's a good watch. I used to love Hong Kong dramas. For no reason, I just have a particular love over the language, Cantonese. I like this dialect a lot, I just feel it's an audio which is nice to hear, kind of ears-enjoying? It should be. Ha ha. But then, it's so sad I can't really speak it; just the stage of listening and understanding it, and that's so; when come to the speaking, ouh, I am doomed. The dialect which sounds nice will be kind of deformed when I actually speak it. Ha ha. I guess I should learn more on it.

Yea. It's a good watch.

Should take it up if you're considering a drama to watch.

Well, just to catch up on these days. Today, this morning, I went to have my breakfast, ops, it should be brunch, with these guys, Xavier, David, Daniel, and Sss at Thompson Corner. Hah, guess what? I bumped into Sharon, coincidentally. Haha. It's actually she had got an extra class, and had been feasted there after the class. But, I was still quite surprised to see her, as we didn't think of meeting each other. Aha, Sibu is small. Or we have actually gotten some kinds of mutual thinkings? Hahaha. Oh yea, also, thanks to Xavier for footing the bill. It's already the second time. Lol. I think I shall foot his bill for the next time!

And then, today, I had really felt the inconvenience of not having self-transportation. It will really be much more convenient and easy if I can drive that I can just go anywhere by myself, without asking my mum to fetch me here and there, especially when she is busy. Sigh. This should track back to the past Saturday. Yea, I had attended the engine class on that particular day, and also finished my practical exercise; which actually means I will be soon getting my L license. Also, in a very near soon, I will start to drive on the road. Anyway, now I am still waiting, for any further information. Hopefully everything will be fine and I can really get my license as soon as possible.

Also, before end, I would like to wish all the fifth formers who are going to sit for their so-called imperative and crucial exam tomorrow. Yea, guys, good luck in SPM. Take it easy, you can do it! Try your very best, and God will do the rest. Good luck to myself too, ha ha. Hopefully I enjoy my dramas to the fullest, hahaha. Don't envy me yea, you all can catch those great dramas and movies up after the exam, about a month eh? Wuahahahahahaha. *evil laughter* Good luck yea!!!!!

GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sincerely from my heart, with much of love, kiss, and hugs.
Love ya. xoxo

18

Today, 14th November 2009, is the trademark of turning 18. I am 18 years old now. People say stepping into 18 means the starting of another life's journey. True, of this age, we get to be more matured; in other word, we are growing into adults. I had read up my previous blog just now, for no reason, it's just an intuitive desire to read it up. Passage by passage, I find myself to be so immature, where it's just the past year. I reflected back a lot of things from the blog. And, yea, if those incidents are happening now, I bet I won't do the same things as before. The mind is growing mature, it will think before act, and possibly produce the best remedies for those circumstances.

Times flies, cruelly. It waits for no one. It has been so fast, I have been living for 18 years. Reflecting back, I have only a feeling in my head now. The term "appreciate" keeps shining in my mind. I would like to say that all of these are out of God. Without His guidance and leading, I won't be who I am today. We should really appreciate! We live out of His grace upon us, we live out of His mercy, His kindness, His sacrifice. I really appreciate, for all the things. My family, my friends, my health, my studies, my everything.

Today, especially, I would like to appreciate, for these friends of mine. There are always these peeps around me to care for me, love me, that I can be strong in life to face those obstacles, challenges, difficulties. I am really touched for all those birthday wishes and blessings which are being sent to me via Facebook, sms, msn, phone call... Sometimes, I seem to have ignored some of you, but, just a simple message, of those few particular words for this special day, really makes me feel that I am been loved.

And yea, I think I do have a lot of blasts. A lot of surprises are being bombed on me. Some of the wishings are really out of my expectation. Ouh, I appreciate a lot!! Thanks guys. Some of them made me cry, because of touched. Yea, my tears is of sweet one. Thank you!!! And, utmostly, it's still the gratitude towards God. I read up this from a friend's blog, He is the ruler over all these! God, is the origin of all these. So, in the end, it's all because of His mightiness. Thank you Lord!!

Last, I am not celebrating my birthday today. But, it's a day with full blessings. Well, I am celebrating with my family some day later, following the lunar calendar. My family used to do that. And, with friends, especially Sharon and lychee, aha, we are celebrating some days later too, when lychee comes back. We got to have a grand birthday party for three of us, and a grand great reunion!!! Yeah!! I really feel so good to have all of the friends! Once again, thanks guys!!!

2012

2012!!!!!!!!!!

I had waited for it for long. And, it's, finally, eventually, released!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's a grand movie, produced by Roland Emmerich, after his previous grand movie, The Day After Tomorrow.

Today. 13th November. The second day since 2012 is released. And, I had watched it up, today. It's, however, initially scheduled to watch tomorrow, for just a simple reason, it's Saturday. But then, by some mean, we had gotten 2 free tickets, and they are kind of VIP type, where we need not to queue up and wait, but straight away go in to the cinema, and the seats are reserved. Ha ha.

It was a good watch. The movie's effects are just too nice that the watch was really an enjoy, sight enjoyment. Besides, the certain parts of the movie reveal the element of touching. It was about the relationship between family members. Family, is just so a crucial element which can easily induce people's tears. The scenes when they care for the other family members, and even willing to sacrifice oneself in order to save the others; ouh, they moved people's hearts, and earned people's tears.

Also, it reveals, somehow, the situation of the end of the world. It reminds us of that, indeed. And, it will be happening in a near soon. We can't expect when it will happen, neither can we predict it. And so, I have liked, been hit seriously on my head, we don't have much time left more. As a Christian, I also know that the end of the world is really going to happen very soon. Yet, there are lots and lots of people who still haven't get salvation. It may be a sensitive talk, but, yea, from Christian perspective, we all need the salvation. Christians!! Come up, we need to tell the world about Jesus, it's imperative; and, it's a commandment from God to us, to spread the news, and to bring back more souls to Him. Anyway, there isn't any offense. They are just some thoughts.

Also, I got from the movie that, we should do whatever we want to do. What I want to say here is about the matter of regret. Not to say the end of this world, but sometimes, when you miss it, you will regret for the rest of your life. So, don't hesitate, do it, don't wait until there is no more chance for you to do so.

And, this, aha, is just some random things to say. There were lots and lots of people who went for the movie. The cinema seemed like bursting, with all of the crowd, the commotion, the atmosphere. But, the phenomenon actually conveys how great the attraction of the movie is, right? Ha ha. It is a good movie, really.

Another squashy day!

~Sharon~

This is purposely taken,
Sharon's Form 6 look.

~ah ma~

~lollipop~

It's another squashy day. Ha ha. Enjoy it much. I just love the time being together with friends, those who are of, just, good compatibility with me that I just will feel so good to be with them, without any hiding, and just can be plain in front of each other, and just will have our own means of ways to produce resonance with the frequencies of one another.

Yea, with Sharon, we just seem to have endless topics to talk on. Talkative. Gregarious. Aha, I can still remember SAT word. But, still, it really depends on the people. We can be so, because we are intimate enough, and, still, the term-COMPATIBILITY. Also, we laughed like crazy peeps today, laughed my ass off! The way Sharon said about that certain being, and that certain incident, lol, I just can't stop laughing!

And yet, today, I got to know a shocking news. Ouh, I can never think of that being, could have ever done those things, not even to imagine them!!! It's so an "implausible" for me. Seriously, it's kind of hard to believe them. But what, they are facts. But, still, it's quite a stun for me.

Also, about the other thing, about the another being, I can actually sense your feeling from your words today. And, I would like to tell you that, be strong. Hmm... And, luckily, she is no longer there. Ha ha. And, lastly, tell you, I just love the time with you, for no reason. I love the ways we talk, and then laugh, crazily. Thank you, sincerely from my heart. I appreciate it, and, mostly, I appreciate you, this crazy friend!

Ha ha. Touched? I wish to make you moved by my words, but, it seems they aren't touching enough. But, yea, they are from my heart. Love ya!!

*Specially dedicate this passage to my dear purpie~ ;with much love, XOXO

law thingy

Today, just now, I went for the Law Test. And, that is my result. Ha ha. I PASSED it. It's 50/50, which is quite out of my expectation. Anyway, thanks God for leading me.

And, after this, it will be the theory class again this coming Saturday, something about engine. Also, something about practical? I have no idea about it. Wait and see. Hopefully it won't be way of TOO dull, that I feel torturing myself again.

And yea, hopefully everything runs well. I don't wish to score excellence in the theory part, but then fail in the real driving part. Lord, I raise it to You. You will make a way. I proclaim that everything will be alright under Your guidance. Amen.

Last, most hopefully, I wish I can get my very own license within this year, 2009, which still possesses around one and a half month. Hopefully.

相亲相爱

Just now, coincidentally, I heard this song being played in radio. It's quite an old song, but it's meaningful. Its lyric is so precisely, MEANINGFUL. It touches my heart, deeply. Family, is really our most precious treasure in life. Family. The word just seems so beautiful. Yea, not more than other things, but, appreciate our family, appreciate the moments with family.

Just a brief sharing. Do enjoy this song.

相亲相爱:

我喜欢一回家就有暖洋洋的灯光在等待,
我喜欢一起床就看到大家微笑的脸庞,
我喜欢一出门就为了家人和自己的理想打拼,
我喜欢一家人心朝着同一个方向眺望.
哦!
我喜欢快乐时马上就要和你分享,
我喜欢受伤时就想起你们温暖的怀抱,
我喜欢生气时就想起你们永远包容多么伟大,
我喜欢旅行时为你把美好记忆带回家.

因为我们是一家人,
相亲相爱的一家人,
有缘才能相聚,有心才会珍惜,
何必让满天乌云遮住眼睛.

因为我们是一家人,
相亲相爱的一家人,
有福就该同享,有难必然同当,
用相知相守换地久天长.

我喜欢一回家就把乱糟糟的心情都忘掉,
我喜欢一起床就带给大家微笑的脸庞,
我喜欢一出门就为了个人和世界的美好打拼,
我喜欢一家人梦朝着同一个方向创造.

哦!
当别人快乐时好像是自己获得幸福一样,
当别人受伤时我愿意敞开最真的怀抱,
当别人生气时告诉他就算观念不同不必激动,
当别人需要时我一定卷起袖子帮助他.

因为我们是一家人,
相亲相爱的一家人,
有缘才能相聚,有心才会珍惜,
何必让满天乌云遮住眼睛.

因为我们是一家人,
相亲相爱的一家人,
有福就该同享,有难必然同当,
用相知相守换地久天长.

处处为你用心,一直最有默契
请你相信这份感情值得感激 

And today... LAW

Yea. And today, I went for the law-studying class for learning car. It was a exhausting torture. Seriously, it was dull; and when I was in the condition of lacking of sleep, the combination performed the perfect result, that I was freakishly suffering for those couples of hours. It was the moment where I wished so much that the time can pass, at least, a bit faster.

Another point, I was starving, as I didn't take my breakfast before going. It was all because I woke up late. Ha ha. I woke up at 7.30am, after being waked up by my mum; while I actually needed to be at the place at 7.45am. So, just had the time to change clothes, I rushed there. But then, finally, I ended up waiting, waiting, and waiting, as there were lots of people.

Finally, the class started around 9.00am. It started with a colour-blindness test. Then, the dull lesson started. I nearly died. Lol.

Aha, and I shall use period of three days to study up the book, to sit the test on Wednesday. Hopefully everything runs well.

books~

Out

It had been a bit hectic these few days.

Friday, 6th November. I had an outing with Xin Mei and Kok Ping. As mentioned before, it was his trip to Sibu. And, that very night, he had to go back to Kuching, and so, we had a quick meet up and brought him around to have some kinds of tour, to take some photos. It was a nice fellowship, a good night, though it had been in quite a rush.

First of all, we met up at Wisma Sanyan. And then, we headed to 丽华宝岛 to view the night scene of Sibu, this city of swan. Lots of fake swan, though. And, the Durin Bridge. Next, 古田公园. Last, 亲善, to feast. We were ravenous.

丽华宝岛~

古田公园~

The next day, I went to a politics talk, had been forced to go. It's about politics of Chinese race. A quite impressive talk, actually. But then , I'm not really so into this aspect that I didn't have much interest in it.

The talk, and its speakers

After the talk, here it is, something funny. There were so many flying insects on the car, it's not our car, though. I don't know who is the owner of it, but I guess he, or she, will get into a shock when seeing it. Ha ha.

Day with Sharon

Today, is the sixth day since I came back home. These days passed so meaninglessly. The daily routines of them are just not more than eat, sleep, online, television, Facebook, PPS, msn, drama, movie, etc... What a life! But then, the life of this type, honestly, it's what known as BORED. I felt like I was rotten, and the mushrooms were growing on me. I felt I am so a typical 'home-girl'.

On the verge of the critical point, I mean to not have such life, any longer. Aha. And that's it, to have the meet up with my dear Sharon. Today. It was a nice time spent with her. We had not met for the past...4 months..? Yep, it's almost 4 months! Oh, she is still such a crazy peep. Ha ha. I just enjoy the time with her.

This time around, we talked a lot, about our things, our sorts of secrets. We played squash. Ha ha. I played illegally, for I'm not the student of the school. But what, I was an ex-student of it, lol, proud to say that, I was a-month-student there before. I love squashy, indeed, freakishly love it. But then, my skills seem descend, the fault of not playing it for long.

Crazy-ing...

And then, we talked, talked, and talked. There are so much things to say. Ha ha. And, we took photos. They can be seen on my facebook account by the way. And, here, specially express my gratitude to Ik Ing, the forever monitor, for being our patient photographer today. Appreciate it a lot!

Ik Ing~

Shortly, I enjoy today much! I love today much! And yea, tomorrow, on the other hand, will be going out to meet Abigail and Andrew. He comes from Kuching, so, aha, Abigail and I shall be his tour guides, of Sibu. And, after all, this is what life should be. *Shouldn't rot myself all the way long. Ha ha.