breakthrough

I had had only a very single post for the, almost, whole month of June, unbelievably. 

What had happened to me, seriously? My days were so packed, so busy, during this very season of summer. 

I have no idea of why, but I really screwed my summer, I mean, in my academic performance. Somehow, sad. Yea, I did. And felt like so sorry for some people. I'm sorry.

Realized that, emotion is irresistible. Yea, may be you can suppress and deal with it in the beginning; but, the duration won't be long. Some day, it'll overflow, when you really can't resist with it any longer.

And is it, unconsciously and unsoundly, turning into a habitual schedule?

And is it, pretense to be so good that, as if, either one is blind, or the other is invisible?

You know what? The words like sad, depressed, are like, futile already. Instead, it's death, the dying off of a heart, which after a lot of pain, a lot of attempts, yet, everything is malfunctioning, and eventually the heart, or the will dies off, and the numbness creeps and attacks, that everything feels normal as though it's what it was. Whilst, in the deep inside, you know it wasn't. But, you know also, coherently, nothing can be done. And you choose to let it be in the end, with the faith of believing time can heal the bleeding heart. 

But is that really the case? If that is, there wouldn't be piles and piles of tissue papers lying around. If that is, there wouldn't be a pair of bulgy eyes on an emotionless face. If that is, there wouldn't be a passionate heart growing cold. If that is, there wouldn't be hypocrite with smile on the face but tears in the heart.

I'm sad, you know? 

Or, do you even care?

in a glimpse.

First thing first, I really can't believe myself for not updating my blog, like, for ages. Unbelievable. Busy? Somehow, but not really. Lazy? Yea, most probably. Darn me.

Alright. Some quick glimpses, just want to keep up and catch up with my life, with the things happened in my life.

And time went by in a really freakishly fast pace. It's June already. June. Nearly half of the year is done! Uh, time is cruel. 

So, 1st June. It was Polycarp's birthday. Gave him a blast, quite a success blast for him. Blessed birthday and a blessed year ahead bro! Spent my time with a bunch of juniors from Japanese program. Nice time with them!

birthday boy!

And then, 3rd of June. Out of random, we went for movie. We shall refer to Rachel, Jazz, Lawrence, Aje, and I. The Bounty Hunter at Sunway Pyramid's cinema. A funny movie! Some sort of ridiculous though.

After that we were so hungry and finally we decided to eat in Pizza Hut. Lawrence went on for his own stuff after the movie, so left only four of us.

Jazz

Rachel

Aje

And then, after that, Aje went off too. And left the three of us. And we had a great time shopping! Woots!! And I met up with Ivy too. 

likey!

Then. 4th of June. Kind of absurd, believe or not, I took my flight back to Sibu! Weeeeeee! I was so happy man! Yea, the 4th of June, early in the morning, I took cab to KTM station. And then took the train to KL Sentral. And then took the bus to LCCT. And then finally, took the Airasia's flight, and flew back to my lovely Sibu! 

Owh! It felt so great to be home!! Uh well, I went back for a purpose of attending a family function. Yeah. It felt undoubtedly awesome to be home, to meet up with family members, relatives. The sheer feeling of home, you know how it feels! Awwww.

sister

my mum

jia yi

wenn & cherng

love this photograph a lot!

And time flew. It's cruel, very cruel. It was Sunday and willing or not, I got to take my flight back to KL. It was sad you know. It was particularly very very very sad when my mum was weeping when I went into the boarding room. And when I saw my mum crying, I just couldn't bear my tears. Urgh. I knew I failed again.

Oh yea. I met Kelvin in the airport. Uh. He's indeed a very good guy! I never met a guy who is such caring and who is such gentleman. Seriously, he is. Thank you for the day! Really really thank you! And of course, thanks God for my safe journeys!

7th of June. The night, I attended the basix class in church. It's a great course! The first lesson I guess I already learned a lot of things, the things which we don't really think of usually. Am looking forward to the rest of the course!

And the 8th of June. It was Summer's birthday. A great day in Midvalley! Blessed birthday sis! Love ya! And yea, Letters to Juliet was a great movie. Hah. Lorenzo! It was sort of a touching, romantic, and sweet love story. 

birthday girl.

love this photograph!!

And we had the LIL's meet-up on Wednesday. It was a great one! God is just so amazing! The meeting on that particular day just felt so good, when everyone seemed to have no intention to end the sharing. Everyone just enjoyed the time sharing and listening to God's works. Praise The Lord!!

And then, Thursday. We had a great oikos! Although there were only five of us, it just felt great! Learned a lot of things through Leonard's sharing. Obedience! The thing I'm learning. Oh Lord. You guide my heart. Guide my heart more than anything else. Keep reminding myself to set my priority to God in everything I'm doing. Please God in everything I'm doing, rather than pleasing myself. Thank you Lord. God is just so great! Hallelujah! Glory is to the mighty Lord!! Amen!

And now, it's Friday. A no-class-day! I'm going to spend my day wisely! 

I shall sleep now. Good Night!

those bits

I must write something. Had been really lazy to do anything. Again, procrastination. It will kill me off some day.

Uh. Well. I mentioned in the previous post the really nice photographs which were taken during the outing with Chris and Ivy. So here's the link!

So here it goes again. I want to buy the camera also! HAHA. I will buy it some day later. It's a promise. Heeee.

Thursday. Carenet. Everyone enjoyed the night, I supposed. And yesh, everyone is talented in acting! LOL.

nice one!

Friday. It was a public holiday, which was also known as the Wesak Day. The special things on the day were the lunch and the dinner. Lunch-ed, *nah, i'm creating word again* at Section 2 of Shah Alam, with Ivy Bong
*too many Ivys* and Abigail. 

 the huge ABC.

And dined at Akasia. Guess what? I cooked the rice by myself. Hah! Dined the meal with Ivy, the rice with canned food. See, I can cook too. Heh.


Saturday. Went to church for the spring cleaning. And Sunway Pyramid after that. Bringing three little juniors shopped and movie-d. Uh well, not really that little, they're just one year younger. Lol. Seeing the three of them: Chris, Polycarp, and Kelvin, I felt like seeing myself back then. Undeniably, time passed too fast. Kind of unbelievable, it'd been nearly a year, and I'd been striving through two semesters, and is currently doing the third one. Time is just so cruel. That's so good of the saying, time and tide wait for no one! Ouh, how true is that!

Well. The movie of the day, Prince of Persia! Nice!! Thumb-up for it!

Went to church service after that. By the time I reached hostel, I felt myself virtually dying. I was seriously, tired. Slept like a dead straight after bathing. 

Sunday. Woke up, prepared, and there's still some spare time left. 

cam-whored.

the just-woke-up-face! @,@

Waited for Alan to fetch, with Ivy. And then guess what? Alan's car broke down. At the end, it turned out that three of us taking the public transportation to go to church. And of course, we were late. Then, stayed at church to attend the International Fellowship. Something from IF: we must be dare and courageous enough to break off the old things, and embrace the new opportunity that we have! A good sermon. And it was very anointing when we're singing Shout to The Lord. God is great!!

Then, after all, came back to Akasia. Willing or not, had to face the reality, of studying for today's test. Haihh. 

snap-shot a bit. heh.

And today. Sadly to say, didn't really do well in the test. 

And today. It rained. Along with very massive thunder and lightning. 

And today. I tidied up my desktop. Let's see!

before

and after!

Lastly, my hair is getting long that I can tie it up already. Get it a cut soon! And I'm going back to Sibu soon!! Yeahhhhhhhhhhhh!!

And just random, I'm still loving Defying Gravity to its really core after all. I heart it!! Heee.

low yat. times square.

I like to blog. Merely like it. I like to jot down the things happened in my life, that they can be some kind of reminiscence some day later.  

And these were what happened. Had a great outing with Chris and Ivy! Low Yat. Chris bought the sooooooooo-cool-camera!! I want to buy too! LOL. Someone out there, please buy one for me. HAHAHA. Times Square. Scheduled to watch movie. But then in the end, shopped. Had dinner, which was also known as McDonald's meals. And took a lot of photographs, which are so and so very super duper hyper the nice! Nah. I really mean it!! Did I said the photographs were taken by using Chris' camera? Haha. That's it. His cool camera produces those great photographs! 

Well, we had the second meet up for the LIL's group. Good sharing. May God bless us more! And yay, the ATUSA's election. I didn't go, as in I couldn't make it. I was supporting spiritually. Haha.

Okie. Kind of tired and sleepy. Let's end with the following photograph.

Niceeee. Likey likey!! :)

farewell

A farewell dinner with Jared. 

So. Glimpses.

Date: 25th May 2010, Tuesday.

Time: 8pm-10pm.

Venue: Kenny Rogers, Subang Parade.

People: Leonard, Jared, Abigail, Summer, Ivy, Andrew, Benny, and yours sincerely.

Nahh. We had a great time spent together. Cherished the moments a lot. The feeling was so good, it was filled with joy, harmony, and peace; although I cried. Lol. Failed. Failed. I really didn't expect to shed my tears. But then, the tears just fall. I couldn't help. Haih. Anyway, Jared is going to leave west zone and back to serve in east zone. So, that means we won't see him anymore in our Oikos, our carenet, our Subang's service. Well, we still can meet him at Cheras' service after all. 

Yay. He is a good brother. A very good servant of God. We used to have good fellowship every time in his car when he's sending us back to our hostel. A very joyous brother! Keep it up! Continue to shine brightly in God's kingdom! May God bless you greatly and abundantly in your life, in your future endeavors, in everything you do! All the best brother! It's really good to have you! Thank you for everything!! 

Going to miss this good brother!! 

ALL THE BEST!! :)

badminton

Monday. Badminton! Heeee. Open air badminton-ed *Seeee. I really love to create words, somehow, illogically.* with Rachel. It was all because there wasn't any vacancy in the only two courts of Akasia. So, yay, we played at a left basketball-court, as in I never saw people playing basketball there. The feeling of haunted, old and broken court. Lol. Played, talked, laughed, exercised, sweated. And kept blaming the shuttlecock when we couldn't pick it up. HAHA. 

Dined at Pak Li, again, for the three consecutive days. But this time around, with Rachel, yay, just after playing badminton. Haha. Got to know some secrets of her. Heeee. If you are reading on this? I want to know your story, tell me about it. Hah! Tell me tell me, some day later, okieee? Okieeee! 

Worked on the C++ assignment which dues the next day.

Chatted in MSN, Facebook, Skype with lots of people. Talked in phone with lots of people too. Texted with lots of people too. And the day passed.

weekends

Saturday. As usual, slept, the thing I do best at! Slept until 11am, nahh, it's considered early for me. Woke up, prepared and went to Subang. And then we headed to Kepong, to Selayang Hospital to visit bro Lau's mum. I didn't know why, but hospital always gave me a feeling of sad, pain, cry, sick, suffer, and all sort of that. I have had the feelings every time I'm at hospital, or any sort of clinics. May God heal the aunty! The spirit of sickness shall be broken off and the joyous and peace shall be filled in her!

After that, went to Azureen's house. We had a grand party for the Spring's Bostonians! I love you guys really really much!! We had so much fun barbecuing, eating, talking, laughing, playing, taking photographs! The food were great! The potato was nice, the coleslaw was nice, the salad was nice, the chicken was nice, the meat was nice, the seedless grape was nice, the watermelon was nice, the spaghetti was nice, the drink was nice, the cheese cake was nice, the people were nice, the atmosphere was nice, the everything was nice! HAHA. Love love love! Great time with all. Thanks Aween for her, and her family's warmest hosting. Thanks Sumaiya for the foods. Thanks Zaim for fetching. Thanks each and every single person!! Photographs were all up to Facebook! Browse on them! 

Sunday. Went to church. Great sermon from Pastor Alice! I like this line: I love You just because I love You! Yea, I love You just because I love You. We gifted Ps. Alice the present. Yay, the point is on gratitude. Learn to appreciate. Indeed. Don't just receive whatever things people did for you without even a heart of appreciation. 

We had a good lunch. Thanks Summer!! Then, got back to Akasia. Chatted with Olivia, and then started to work on my C++ thingy. It's driving me crazy when I just couldn't get the correct output. LOL. But then, yay, C++ gives a really great sense of satisfaction when you'd tried so hard to figure everything out and when you successfully ran the program and got the right output! That's the satisfaction!! HAHA. A lesson to be learnt: don't ever give up easily. You never know what will happen at the next moment. Hah!

Had dinner with Ivy, at Pak Li, again. Heee. I enjoyed eating with you. All the best for your exam! You can do it fine! Pray fervently, try your very best, and God will do the rest. Love ya!

This week is going to be a packed week. Farewell for Jared, movie with Ivy, 3+5 connection, lots more C++ exercises, lots more sleeps, lot more craps, etc. Haha. Nah. Am looking forward to them! 

Night! I want to, I should, I must, sleep earlier tonight!

typical Friday

A typical Friday of this particular summer semester means a-no-class-day. Heee. Slept until late, as in the typical schedule of a typical day. Woke up at 11am. But then due to severe starvation, I hadn't have dinner for the previous night, so yay, due to the hungriness, I got back to sleep again. Nah. Sleep can get rid of the feeling of starving. So, then, woke up again at around 1pm, when Ivy got back from school, and we had our lunch together.

The noon was typical. Watched movies, facebook-ed, slept. Typically typical enough. Tried to figure out C++. See. I had been a good girl. No outing. HAHA. You know why? Told you, I'm a good good girl. Heeeee. Hahahhahaha. The fact is, I got not much money left!! Uh-huh. Sob! It's sad to be alone in hostel when all of the roomies were out for movie, karaoke, party, etc. Awwww. It's sad you know!

Had dinner with Ivy at Pak Li then. Hadn't eat there for quite some time, so that's why, a sudden desire to dine at there. And I was so dedicated to work on my assignment for C++. But then it made me spin! Lol. I was on the verge going crazy when I just couldn't figure out where was my mistake which made the whole program not working. It's kind of frustrating when you keep compiling the program, but it just doesn't run! Nah. Still. Patience. Finally I figured it out! Thanks God!

Sleepy. Look forward to the BBQ party with my fellow ex-Bostonians!!

song lead

Song lead tonight, in Oikos. Pray that we have an anointed time of praise and worship! Pray that God is with us, and Holy Spirit fills and touches everyone! Pray that we have a fruitful and victorious Oikos tonight! Prepare ourselves for a great fellowship! Amen!

Had the very first group-met-up for the Life Impacting Life (LIL) today. It's a good idea. It's a good carried-out. At least we had a good start. Keep going. May it be a blessing for each and everyone of us. And may the blessings be flown around, that we're the transforming agents to bring the transformation in our market place ministry. Thanks to the initiator of this move, Andrew who makes this thing works and happens. 

Keep going. May this movement really help us to grow, days by days. Could really see the problems, the utmost of the communication and relationship's criterion. Mama and Monkey? LOL. I really burst into laughter when Akira said about this. But then, yay, that's the problem we're facing. Break off! Conquer! 

All the best for my song-leading tonight!

the night.

夜太残忍。揪撕，牵动心弦；心中最深处的每一个故事，每一种情感再一次被牵引，悸动徘徊，久久不散。夜深寂静，是泪水泛滥的最佳归宿。灯火阑珊，旧事跃跃蠢动，在某一个深处，一直不断重复着上演。某些歌曲，影片，短文又放肆的催使泪腺强烈的被刺激。冷风瑟瑟，却吹不走伤痛，更其不了丝毫麻醉作用。堆积在桌上的是湿过了的面纸。

父母。深深的悸动，感触。“绑匪”，这套戏留有太多的感触，太多的深刻醒悟。感动。父母的爱太无私，甚至可以牺牲自己，为了保护孩子。为了孩子，才会这么的不顾一切。很值得一看的一出戏。演员的真挚，写实的情节，感动的父爱，感动的母爱，赚了许多的热泪。想想，父母的伟大，父母的关爱，还是忍不住会流泪，因为想念，终究，还是会这么强烈的想家，那遥在一方的家。

朋友。一样的悸动，感触。“朋友”，这首歌到底是该纳属于开心的，还是伤心的呢？每一次听着听着，泪水就不由自主的夺眶而出。一生一起走，一句话一辈子。很多时候，是因为这一份的友谊爱，才会关心。会因为朋友的高兴而开心，会因为朋友的伤心而难过。是因为在乎，才会开心，伤心，生气。朋友，也是会有吵架的时候，是为要证明它的坚固，为要证明它经得起考验。因为这一种的默契，一个微笑就可以带来极其大的鼓励与肯定，一个拥抱就足以表明一切，一个给以依赖的肩膀就可以带来安慰。生活不要太忙碌，有时候错过了就很难从头来过。珍惜。珍惜生命中的每一段友谊。

某一个特别的你。同样的悸动，感触。心里的最最深处始终存有一个特别的位子。时间可以淡忘？甚至冲淡感情？从未想起，因为未曾忘记？我说，时时想起，因为不想忘记。时间带来的是更残酷的折磨。明明在乎，却装得轻松。明明该哭，却得笑。有这么一句话说，当我决定离去时，才发现我的心早已留在你那里了。要勇敢，要成熟，对自己说。

好想，很强烈的欲望，找一个可以倾诉的朋友来听我倾诉。或者，谁来给我一个紧紧的拥抱，来安慰一下我。现实还是胜过欲望。现实永远是残酷的胜利者。抱着枕头，用力的哭，然后入睡，醒来，会是美好的一天！

碰触了久违的华文。因为感觉上它比较贴切，在这里。

the semi finals

Woot woot!!

Had a really great day watching Thomas Cup semi finals, live at Stadium Bukit Jalil. It was indeed an awesome experience witnessing the match lively, first-hand-ly! 

So there were a bunch of peeps, the Intec's ADFP-ians: Alex, Hobart, Chin Huat, Akira, Andrew, Bryan, San, Xiu, Chin Leng, Angalina, Lina, me, and another girl (so sorry that I don't know what's her name), went all the way from Shah Alam to Bukit Jalil to witness the legend, and to express our deepest supports! Lol. By the way, there was also another gang from Intec's Ausmat-ians who were also going for the event.

The semi finals. Indonesia versus Japan, and Malaysia versus China. 

Indonesia versus Japan. Great. The third and fourth match were so great, and so exciting! Yea. That's what supposed to be called, semi-finals. Both were playing hard. In the end, Indonesia, as expected, won the match. 4 versus 1. The Japanese guys are cute though. Hahaha.

Malaysia versus China. We lost. But we won in our spirit! It's a good picture and scene when the people cheered, shouted, shrieked, clapped, yielded, jumped for supporting the team. The supporting flame and spirit were seriously buzzed and burst in the stadium during the match of Malaysia against China. But what I could say, China is indeed a great team. They are seriously good at their skills, but, seriously, not their manner. Ling Dan is, seriously seriously seriously, way too arrogant! Ish ish. But, aiks, he does possess the rights to be arrogant for his great play. But not, still, if he has a better attitude, he will be even greater. Hmmm.

Uh. Sleepy and tired now. Sleeeeeeeeeeep. Night world!

okieee

Didn't know what happened to my post before this one. No idea on why the background was white in color. Lol. Let it be. Didn't know how to fix it also. 

I'm okieee, after a good cry. Thank you people!

This is an extraordinary short post. :P